Shiraume (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
shiraume_fic) wrote2006-04-09 04:04 pm
shiraume_fic) wrote2006-04-09 04:04 pm
[Fanfiction] Sakuran - Part 6: Return to Innocence (YnM)
TITLE: Sakuran
CHAPTER: 6/6, COMPLETE.
AUTHOR: Shiraume
RATING: PG-13 (Angst/Romance)
SPOILERS: Entire anime season and manga storyline up to volume 9.
WARNINGS: Slightly AU-ish.
PAIRING: Muraki + Hisoka, Tsuzuki + Hisoka.
DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine, except the insanity.
Previous chapters are here:
Sakuran - Prologue
Sakuran - Part One: Chance Meetings
Sakuran - Part Two: Advent
Sakuran - Part Three: Past and Present
Sakuran - Part Four: Passage to Eden
Sakuran - Part Five: Descent
Innocence is a form of ignorance. (1)
PART SIX: Return to Innocence
"Hisoka?"
Green eyes opened slowly, and focused on a blur of purple.
"AAAH!!" Tsuzuki jumped away. "You idiot! Don't do that!" Hisoka exclaimed, sitting up with a scowl on his face, but Tsuzuki chuckled, obviously recovered from his surprise.
"Sorry. But I wanted to tell you it's lunch time."
"Eh...?" Hisoka blinked.
Tsuzuki was grinning. "You fell asleep while doing your paperwork"
"I fell asleep?" Hisoka could feel the heat rising in his face, and inwardly cursed his fair complexion that hid nothing.
"Yep! And you looked so cute when you were sleeping!"
"You...you idiot!"
Tsuzuki chuckled again, unfazed by the indignant tone. The blush staining Hisoka's cheeks never failed to please him mightily; Hisoka looked so innocent and sweet when he blushed like that. "Come on, Hisoka. Don't you want to eat lunch with me? Let's go outside. It's a beautiful day~"
Like he could say no to those wide, pleading purple eyes. "...Fine." Resigned, Hisoka got up and followed his partner. Before he left the office, he looked back at the empty room, as if searching for something.
"Hisoka?"
"Sorry. I felt like I forgot something." Tsuzuki gave him a confused look, and Hisoka almost smiled; Tsuzuki looked exactly like a curious puppy just now. "It's nothing. Let's go."
**********
The image of Tsuzuki and Hisoka walking down the hallway wavered like a surface of water. A hand reached out to touch it lightly, and the image rippled from the point of contact.
"Fate is like a game of poker, isn't it?" The young girl with sad blue eyes did not reply. A bitter laugh, then: "A full house is a full house, no matter what the suit. As long as all the right cards are in one hand, it doesn't matter which suits end up in it." Single silver eye glinted. "And all of us are merely God's deck of cards, dealt anew with each game. Nothing more."
She looked away, but turned her eyes back to him when the mild voice calmly continued. "God's fate decreed one-third of the angels fall; it didn't matter to Him which third."
"Sensei..." Tsubaki-hime's voice was pained. "The only way to grant your wish, to save Hisoka's life, was..."
"- To turn the world back to how it used to be. I know." A pause. "Once again, Muraki Kazutaka, not Shidou Saki, is the one who fell from grace." The adult Muraki's lips curved in a smile that did not reach his eye. "I don't mind."
"Sensei, your memories from the other world..." Tsubaki-hime began, but trailed off.
A shrug. "Which, unfortunately, only I have. What about them?"
Tsubaki-hime bit her lower lip. "I would take them away if I could. But I can't."
Muraki chuckled. "Oh, don't worry. This isn't your fault. If anything, none of this would have happened if bouya did not make his wish in the first place." Tsubaki-hime flinched, but did not answer. Muraki turned his back to her, walking into the darkness towards to his own consciousness. Tsubaki-hime watched, her expression helpless and angry and sad.
Just before Muraki faded from her sight, his soft voice floated back to her, so quiet that it was nearly lost in the darkness around him.
"The trouble is, I'm not sure if I can bring myself to hate him for it."
**********
Tsuzuki and Hisoka picked a spot under the sakura trees to eat lunch. Soon, Watari unexpectedly surfaced from his lab and joined them, dragging a reluctant Tatsumi behind him. Hisoka almost smiled; it was the first time they were all together since the Kyoto incident, and having Tatsumi and Watari with them somehow made him feel warmer. More complete.
Despite the lingering pain Hisoka could sense deep inside, Tsuzuki was cheerful, chattering like his old self and trying to steal Hisoka's food. Kyoto was still fresh in their mind, but they had survived, possibly even stronger for the experience; since then, Tsuzuki's emotions felt more balanced and grounded. Hisoka no longer tried to suppress the warm feelings inside him, for and from Tsuzuki, and did not resist a smile, listening to Tsuzuki with only half an ear.
A sakura petal landed on the back of his hand, tickling his knuckles. Although sakura blossoms usually reminded him of unpleasant memories, today Hisoka noticed how beautiful the petal was. Oddly enough, though, this petal was pure white in its color. Weren't Juohcho's sakura blossoms pale pink?
Impulsively, Hisoka picked up the petal and brought it to his lips. The softness of the petal felt strangely familiar, yet he could not quite place the feeling. A warm breeze caressed Hisoka's face like a gentle hand, lifting the petal and carrying it away, and Hisoka watched with an inexplicable sense of loss as the white petal drifted in the wind, moving farther and farther away from him.
"Hisoka?"
Startled, Hisoka brought his attention back to his partner. Behind Tsuzuki's worried face, Tatsumi and Watari were also staring at him in concern. It was only then Hisoka realized a tear was running down his cheek. Slowly, Tsuzuki reached out and brushed away the tear, the gentle touch easing the sudden tightness in his chest, and Hisoka closed his eyes. Tatsumi quietly cleared his throat at what was obviously a private display of affection, but Tsuzuki paid him no heed, taking Hisoka's hand into his own. Hisoka felt the warm feelings flooding into him again from the contact. Concern, affection, and however they might express or even perceive it, love.
Love that was as pure and exquisite as the sakura blossoms that rained over them warmed his heart, and Hisoka gave Tsuzuki a rare, heartfelt smile.
"I'm okay. It's just...the sakura blossoms are beautiful today."
"Aa. They are."
The two lapsed into silence, still holding hands. Tatsumi and Watari exchanged a look, keeping a discreet silence to allow them the precious moment. A few minutes later, the four of them engaged in another conversation, livelier and happier.
The white sakura petals floated in the air, enveloped in the embrace of the breeze gentle as a baby's breath. A new burst of wind scattered them and the airborne petals drifted upward, floating higher and higher. The sun shone brightly, catching the sakura petals as they ascended towards heaven.
FINIS
(1) So saith the author. Yes, tomatoes and rotten vegetables this way, please.
Author's Note: Sorry about the short chapter. Truthfully, this whole fic was one gigantic blob when it was first written, but I divided it up to make the editing easier in 2004, when I began posting it.
Thank you so much for all your encouragement and support, especially those who commented to tell me they like this fanfic. It meant a lot to me and gave me the push I really needed while I was dragging through the editing process over -- good Lord -- two years. (It would have been faster to just write another fic. For seriously.) And thank you very much for your patience. I love you all. ^__^
CHAPTER: 6/6, COMPLETE.
AUTHOR: Shiraume
RATING: PG-13 (Angst/Romance)
SPOILERS: Entire anime season and manga storyline up to volume 9.
WARNINGS: Slightly AU-ish.
PAIRING: Muraki + Hisoka, Tsuzuki + Hisoka.
DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine, except the insanity.
Previous chapters are here:
Sakuran - Prologue
Sakuran - Part One: Chance Meetings
Sakuran - Part Two: Advent
Sakuran - Part Three: Past and Present
Sakuran - Part Four: Passage to Eden
Sakuran - Part Five: Descent
Innocence is a form of ignorance. (1)
"Hisoka?"
Green eyes opened slowly, and focused on a blur of purple.
"AAAH!!" Tsuzuki jumped away. "You idiot! Don't do that!" Hisoka exclaimed, sitting up with a scowl on his face, but Tsuzuki chuckled, obviously recovered from his surprise.
"Sorry. But I wanted to tell you it's lunch time."
"Eh...?" Hisoka blinked.
Tsuzuki was grinning. "You fell asleep while doing your paperwork"
"I fell asleep?" Hisoka could feel the heat rising in his face, and inwardly cursed his fair complexion that hid nothing.
"Yep! And you looked so cute when you were sleeping!"
"You...you idiot!"
Tsuzuki chuckled again, unfazed by the indignant tone. The blush staining Hisoka's cheeks never failed to please him mightily; Hisoka looked so innocent and sweet when he blushed like that. "Come on, Hisoka. Don't you want to eat lunch with me? Let's go outside. It's a beautiful day~"
Like he could say no to those wide, pleading purple eyes. "...Fine." Resigned, Hisoka got up and followed his partner. Before he left the office, he looked back at the empty room, as if searching for something.
"Hisoka?"
"Sorry. I felt like I forgot something." Tsuzuki gave him a confused look, and Hisoka almost smiled; Tsuzuki looked exactly like a curious puppy just now. "It's nothing. Let's go."
The image of Tsuzuki and Hisoka walking down the hallway wavered like a surface of water. A hand reached out to touch it lightly, and the image rippled from the point of contact.
"Fate is like a game of poker, isn't it?" The young girl with sad blue eyes did not reply. A bitter laugh, then: "A full house is a full house, no matter what the suit. As long as all the right cards are in one hand, it doesn't matter which suits end up in it." Single silver eye glinted. "And all of us are merely God's deck of cards, dealt anew with each game. Nothing more."
She looked away, but turned her eyes back to him when the mild voice calmly continued. "God's fate decreed one-third of the angels fall; it didn't matter to Him which third."
"Sensei..." Tsubaki-hime's voice was pained. "The only way to grant your wish, to save Hisoka's life, was..."
"- To turn the world back to how it used to be. I know." A pause. "Once again, Muraki Kazutaka, not Shidou Saki, is the one who fell from grace." The adult Muraki's lips curved in a smile that did not reach his eye. "I don't mind."
"Sensei, your memories from the other world..." Tsubaki-hime began, but trailed off.
A shrug. "Which, unfortunately, only I have. What about them?"
Tsubaki-hime bit her lower lip. "I would take them away if I could. But I can't."
Muraki chuckled. "Oh, don't worry. This isn't your fault. If anything, none of this would have happened if bouya did not make his wish in the first place." Tsubaki-hime flinched, but did not answer. Muraki turned his back to her, walking into the darkness towards to his own consciousness. Tsubaki-hime watched, her expression helpless and angry and sad.
Just before Muraki faded from her sight, his soft voice floated back to her, so quiet that it was nearly lost in the darkness around him.
"The trouble is, I'm not sure if I can bring myself to hate him for it."
Tsuzuki and Hisoka picked a spot under the sakura trees to eat lunch. Soon, Watari unexpectedly surfaced from his lab and joined them, dragging a reluctant Tatsumi behind him. Hisoka almost smiled; it was the first time they were all together since the Kyoto incident, and having Tatsumi and Watari with them somehow made him feel warmer. More complete.
Despite the lingering pain Hisoka could sense deep inside, Tsuzuki was cheerful, chattering like his old self and trying to steal Hisoka's food. Kyoto was still fresh in their mind, but they had survived, possibly even stronger for the experience; since then, Tsuzuki's emotions felt more balanced and grounded. Hisoka no longer tried to suppress the warm feelings inside him, for and from Tsuzuki, and did not resist a smile, listening to Tsuzuki with only half an ear.
A sakura petal landed on the back of his hand, tickling his knuckles. Although sakura blossoms usually reminded him of unpleasant memories, today Hisoka noticed how beautiful the petal was. Oddly enough, though, this petal was pure white in its color. Weren't Juohcho's sakura blossoms pale pink?
Impulsively, Hisoka picked up the petal and brought it to his lips. The softness of the petal felt strangely familiar, yet he could not quite place the feeling. A warm breeze caressed Hisoka's face like a gentle hand, lifting the petal and carrying it away, and Hisoka watched with an inexplicable sense of loss as the white petal drifted in the wind, moving farther and farther away from him.
"Hisoka?"
Startled, Hisoka brought his attention back to his partner. Behind Tsuzuki's worried face, Tatsumi and Watari were also staring at him in concern. It was only then Hisoka realized a tear was running down his cheek. Slowly, Tsuzuki reached out and brushed away the tear, the gentle touch easing the sudden tightness in his chest, and Hisoka closed his eyes. Tatsumi quietly cleared his throat at what was obviously a private display of affection, but Tsuzuki paid him no heed, taking Hisoka's hand into his own. Hisoka felt the warm feelings flooding into him again from the contact. Concern, affection, and however they might express or even perceive it, love.
Love that was as pure and exquisite as the sakura blossoms that rained over them warmed his heart, and Hisoka gave Tsuzuki a rare, heartfelt smile.
"I'm okay. It's just...the sakura blossoms are beautiful today."
"Aa. They are."
The two lapsed into silence, still holding hands. Tatsumi and Watari exchanged a look, keeping a discreet silence to allow them the precious moment. A few minutes later, the four of them engaged in another conversation, livelier and happier.
The white sakura petals floated in the air, enveloped in the embrace of the breeze gentle as a baby's breath. A new burst of wind scattered them and the airborne petals drifted upward, floating higher and higher. The sun shone brightly, catching the sakura petals as they ascended towards heaven.
(1) So saith the author. Yes, tomatoes and rotten vegetables this way, please.
Author's Note: Sorry about the short chapter. Truthfully, this whole fic was one gigantic blob when it was first written, but I divided it up to make the editing easier in 2004, when I began posting it.
Thank you so much for all your encouragement and support, especially those who commented to tell me they like this fanfic. It meant a lot to me and gave me the push I really needed while I was dragging through the editing process over -- good Lord -- two years. (It would have been faster to just write another fic. For seriously.) And thank you very much for your patience. I love you all. ^__^
no subject
I <3 it and would recommend it any day :)
*bookmarks*
no subject
Thank you. ^__^ I'm very happy that you enjoyed this fic!
no subject
I actually feel sorry for him. His and Tsubaki's conversation hurt a bit, but it was true. It's the way it should have been, I suppose. And I agree, how can you hate a wish like that when the end is supposed to be that way?
Thank you for writing this. I truly enjoyed reading it, from the time you wrote it up to now. :)
no subject
I think who's right for whom is highly subjective, especially because within the canon timeline, none of the fanon pairings are established as such. This Kazutaka, being a what-if version of canon Muraki, was necessarily a non-canon one, and I hope that he was a believable one, and the pseudo-pairing had a plausible buildup. ^__^
In that scene, Muraki is resentful, the way Hisoka was at first when his wish was granted. His one chance at what might have been redemption is effectively declared null and void, and just maybe, for Muraki, it might have have been better if none of this happened in the first place.
But Muraki still has his memories as young shinigami!Kazutaka who loved Hisoka. Even if the other reality never happened for the rest of the world, he remembers, and has to carry the burden of memory for the rest of his life. And he doesn't know if he really hates Hisoka for that.
And of course the big question of WHY is open to interpretation. XD
I should stop saying things when I'm drunk. XD Thank you for reading. I'm so happy you liked it. ^__^
So I can comment too???
(Anonymous) 2006-04-11 08:09 pm (UTC)(link)Anyway, this is the first time I'm posting a respons...so, uh, yeah, I'm too shy to do anything but lurking in the corner*_*!
Anyway, thankyou for the beautiful ending of the fic!
Will wait for another fic...*_*;;;
-Helen
Re: So I can comment too???
I actually don't write for the YnM fandom anymore. (I wrote Sakuran in the beginning of 2003, although I've revised parts of it since then.) This isn't the only fic I've written for the fandom to date, but I'm afraid Prince of Tennis has eaten me alive since. XD
Thank you~! ^__^ I'm glad you liked this fic.
no subject
Excellent job! You took a concept that few could bend their brain around (a believable 'Muraki + consenting!Hisoka') and made it gold. I applaude you.
no subject
Thank you! I'm glad -- plausibility was one thing that worried me a lot while editing this fic. ^__^
no subject
*bliss*
Oh, I. yes. Love. There are no words.
*SQUISHIES!*
Perfect.
no subject
*blushes and loves you madly* Thank you. ♥
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
call me an optimist. ^-^
no subject
And yeah, I'm one of the optimists, myself. Hope springs eternal!
no subject
<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
no subject
Thank you. ^__^